Thursday, 2 May 2013
CREDIT:
MISCHIEVOUS KISS OFFICIAL WEBSITE (SEUNG JO'S DIARY COLUMN)
Translated
to Chinese By: Korea Version Mischievous Kiss
Translated
to English By: reena29shadow
Edited By:
ChaBori204
EPISODE 13
Hae Ra said that she hope we could
start trying. Start? Talking about start...
To me, do I still have the capability
to start over with others? I left all my heart on other place...
What I need now is only a small corner.
Other than that I have nothing to ask for. Okay, just let me take it
as I don't know, preserve to the end.
The staff salary for this month has
also been used as the fund to develop new game. It's so difficult to
make a living, too scary. I can only close my eyes cowardly.
Why didn't you go back to your room
and cry? The sound of you crying can be heard in my room. It sounds
like a knife cutting into my heart.
What do you want me to do? I can't cry
just like you did, I can't vent my anger just like how you
did...because all these are my choice. Silly me can only hate myself
and then bear the pain as if there're millions of needles sticking
into me. What can I do?
Received a message saying “Don't
forget to have your lunch even when you are busy!” Hae Ra tried
acting like a girlfriend.
But the person who came to my mind was
only you. You always hope that I can introduce you as my girlfriend
to other people. Just when I have the idea to do it, it went to
something that I really hate. Although I can't let you know what I'm
thinking, but I can still send you a message, right?
“Absent without a leave?” (Feeling
unwell?)
“Deduct your salary!" (Eat well, don't
be sad anymore)
'Where's Oh Ha Ni?' Now the first
thing I thought of unknowingly every morning is you.
Went for a date? It's only days after I
went for matchmaking, and now you're going on a date! Who will it be
this time? Must be that weird guy!
Why didn't it ever cross my mind? The
truth that Ha Ni might walk towards others. That bright smile, that
kind heart. There's also probability that it will be shared with
others. Why?
At that moment, something went through
my heart, making a hole! A gush of wind named Ha Ni blew through that
hole.
No one to help me to get ready my
stuff before work. Also no one to tell me to come back earlier. No
one to nag me about “Where's your wallet? Keys?”
You went into my world, and now you
are giving up on me...
“The two of you look good together”.
I'm really good at saying things that was not meant to be. Yes, easy
for me. To Oh Ha Ni, ain't I always doing this to her?
So I'll just continue like this today.
Can't let you know my true feeling. Can't express to you my true
feeling.
Looking at you and Bong Joon Gu
together, I'm not sad at all. Even though I'm so angry that I wanted
to break his arms that you're holding on to. It's a simple thing for
me to hide this feelings.
Definitely can't open the door.
Although you said you are happy with Bong Joon Gu, even though I
really wanted to shout out loud that I like you. Definitely not
opening the door that I'm holding on tightly is my only wish now.
Have to lock this door tightly. Pack
and put down everything about you and not to remember it anymore.
Then, becoming someone who doesn't know you and carry on with my
life.
Even when I'm with Hae Ra, you still
always appear in front of me. When you make mistakes, the look when
you're angry, I will pack all this up and leave it behind...
The time when we had meals together,
the time when we were studying but end up sleeping on the desk
together, the night that both of us spent together, the kiss that we
both shared. Take it as I'll forget everything. Even if we were to
pass by each other on the street, I'll act as if I don't know you.
Living my life as if I have forgotten everything.
Like today, even if I remember
it...it's also only a memory.
Hae Ra is very compatible with me.
Very pretty, slim, good in tennis, very smart, always have common
topics with me, read lots of books too. Everything will turn out
well.
Eun Jo-ah, let it be. I will fall in
love with Hae Ra one day. Let me be an idiot who can forget
everything immediately.
Even after hesitation, I still choose
to leave you. You, who have left me, who will never look back is
always making me look around.
Even if it's only the wind blows.
Thinking that maybe you will come, looking everywhere for you...
Just need more time, I can forget.
Sooner or later, I will fall in love with Hae Ra.
“Heard that she will give an answer
to Joon Gu's proposal today!” Ju Ri and Min Ah following behind me,
saying it in the volume that I'm able to hear.
I really can't believe it. Oh Ha Ni is
getting married? Just the thought of her smiling at Bong Joon Gu,
kissing him, is already enough to cause the anger to rise up in me.
I can't take the feeling of losing
everything and being abandoned anymore. Why would I feel abandoned? I
didn't do anything for her at all, isn't it? We couldn't sit down
properly to discuss about the future. I really hope she will stay by
my side forever. What should I do about my selfishness?
Can I only just ignore my true
feeling? I feel as if I'm being drown in the deep sea, unable to
breathe. Struggling very hard, closed my eyes, struggling.
Finally I realize that the air I rely
on to survive is Oh Ha Ni. Only with you I can breathe. What should I
do? Baek Seung Jo, what should you do? My heart is lost...
What am I doing here? To say what?
What should I do even if I manage to see her? Or just to clarify
something? Or just to hear the heart breaking news of her accepting
Joon Gu's proposal personally?
Waiting for you who walked through the
rain, waiting for you who I'm supposed to let go off, waiting for you
whom I want to catch hold on, waiting for you to tell you not to
leave me.
“You like him? Bong Joon Gu?”
“Of course...he likes me for 4
years!”
Words from Ha Ni cut through my heart
like a knife. Looking at my bleeding heart, I'm finally certain about
my feelings.
“Just because someone said he likes
you, you are able to fall in love with him? You like me! Other than
me, you won't like any other guy, isn't it?” I said loudly.
I thought that the feelings for Ha Ni
could be forgotten easily, but my arrogant inner self finally accept
the truth that I couldn't live without her. Also once again certain
that if I lose her, I will spend the rest of my life in regret.
“You're right. I only like you but
what can I do? There isn't space for me in your heart!”
Right, this is enough. I only need you
to tell me you like me. Just like the wind that comes with the rain,
my heart has already race towards you. No matter how many times I shout
'you're mine' will never be enough. So I walked towards you, my lips
found yours.
I have never forgotten how your lips
feel after our first kiss. Your lips that always calling out to me...
Only then I realize the moment when I
swear that I will forget you, till now, I have never did that.
You have already went into my heart
like the rain. Missing you makes me getting ever near to you. This
moment, I won't let go of you anymore. I'm not able to walk towards
that darkness anymore. I knew this will happen long ago.
That day, when I see you studying very
hard, you already caused me to think that you are special. The day
when you were dancing to that cute jumping dance that moved my heart.
The days when you were angry at me by saying you will forget about
me, and from that beautiful day that you fell asleep in the forest
bench...
Wednesday, 1 May 2013
Once upon a time we were so close but now we are like strangers...
Once upon a time we could laugh at anything around us but now only awkwardness is between us...
Once upon a time we were together on the ground but now you are up above the sky...leaving me far behind....
This is what i feel now friends...no one has to blame coz it just me who keeps the distance...
thanks for the memories ...the memories that i would never forget for the rest of my life...and thanks for everything...
WISHING YOU HAPPINESS AND HEALTHY LIFE REGARDLESS WHERE YOU ARE OR WHO YOU'RE WITH! yes...you know who you are~~
Lots of love,
~그냥 친구~
-Farafisha-
;;
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